Your irrelevancy is manifest.

I can’t take all the credit for the death of your favorite party, but only a little.

P.S. It’s been fun watching you defend a subscriber to anthropogenic global warming. Good work.

Sarah Palin is a member of the Pentecostal Assemblies of God.

You’re a Roman Catholic.

Sarah Palin thinks you’re going to aytch-ee-double-hockey-moms-sticks

You’re right. Blackface jokes have no place in political discourse. Referencing your proclivity for SS-dressup when surfing for war porn, on the other hand, is quite civil if not totally accurate.

Also, I noticed you’ve put up a new picture on your main page to replace the one of you doing a Disney’s Quasimodo impression. You’re looking very skinny, especially in the neck.

Keep up the great work!

A few things on this:

• I’m elated to finally see someone so close to Michelle admit that “she’s a right-wing race and gender traitor”, even if it is in that “Can I still lick Michelle’s crack clean con queso when you’re out of town, Jesse?” kinda way.
• I have yet to see a strong argument against what is described as “identity politics.” To be honest, it seems to be such a tedious concept as to be meaningless. I mean, if I had to distill the current state of the debate down to one sentence it would be, “The white male voting bloc should be the only voting bloc.”
• It’s incorrect to put a comma after “i.e.,” which is Latin for “id est”, i.e. “it is.” Exceptions abound; for example, in the case of the previous sentence where “i.e.” is clearly being used as the object of a prepositional phrase and the comma within the quotation marks is offsetting a dependent clause.

Not Aztec math!

I’m glad you’ve uncovered this. I can’t believe there are people who want to teach the descendants of native Central Americans about the greatness of their ancestral civilizations. You know, before they were destroyed by European conquistadors. You deserve an award for journalistic excellence! You’re like a conservative Greg Palast with limited connections and no talent.

I just hope these “La Raza” schools aren’t a result of people like you telling these kids that they don’t and can’t contribute anything to America. Them being so brown and illegal and all. That would be sad. And you would have to give up that award for journalistic excellence. You’d have to settle for something underscoring your propensity for hack propaganda.

P.S. I’ve also noticed your successful efforts in undermining our ability to win hearts-n-minds in Iraq, too! Looks like you and your allies have made a big score.

I understand that you’re really upset about your site’s plummeting ratings, but calm down.

Maybe you should stop reading Democratic Underground for a few weeks? It may relieve some of that Us v. Them, self-victimization, Left/Right thinking. Or, I dunno… Spend some quality (i.e. non-paranoiac) time with your kids?

P.S. I think it would be funny if you started calling me a “head-in-the-sand moonbat”. Kinda has a ring to it, dontcha think?

Shut down the horrendously racist, conspiracy theory laden Immigration Blog. Because this shit is unacceptable:

The root of the evil: our apparent forced march toward a “comprehensive” New World Order of regional and ultimately global government, where nation-busting mass immigration is just one part of the process.

And I’d like to think you weren’t lying when you told O’Reilly you don’t agree with this kind of thing:

And without the summary removal of illegal aliens—sending them packing without years of immigration litigation — there will be no real immigration law enforcement in this country . . . because no one will be leaving anytime soon.

Goin’ after the Dixie Chicks, eh? I have to agree with you on this: They’re not exactly the most eloquent commentators on the meaning of patriotism. But they’re certainly representative of a sizable group of Americans disillusioned by injustices done in their name.

But, you know, whatever. I’m sure you would have told Ben Franklin to “Shut up and print, you French-speaking, muffin top-having ugly face! The Stamp Act rocks!”

P.S. When did Levi-Strauss start making potato sacks?

P.P.S. And, again: No! You may not see my muffin top.

Oh man. Your taste in diss tracks is très wack. “Sabotage” [YouTube Link] by Beastie Boys? C’mon. You can do better than that.

You don’t remember when they started some beef with Bush on the web in March 2003? Talking shit about his “oil war”?

“In a World Gone Mad” [download here; lyrics here]

I’m guessing you’ve never heard Nas’s “Ether”, either.

I embrace y’all with napalm.
Blows up, no guts, left chest, face gone.
…
I’ve been fucked over, left for dead, dissed and forgotten.
Luck ran out, they hoped that I’d be gone, stiff and rotten.
…
Ask me if I’m tryin’ to kick knowledge.
Nah, I’m tryin’ to kick the shit you need to learn though:
That Ether, that shit that make your soul burn slow.

I think it really fits you, your jingoblogging buddies, and the way you’ve conducted yourselves through the Zarqawi Corpse media swarm. No need to thank me. Just watching your back, yo. ;-)

Congrats on the stark improvement you’ve made on VENT. We were all kind of vicious here.

Keep it up, and you may be able to get through an entire episode in one take!

P.S. I think I see a trend here:
(more…)

Couple things.

1) Don’t you think this comic would be funnier with “Haditha feathers”?

2) When going off the handle over a perceived euphemism, you should probably avoid perpetuating euphemisms. Seriously. It’s called the “Boston Massacre”. Not the “Boston Incident”.

Is “coddle” really the right word to use here? Seems to me they’re just enforcing the laws.

This is what you get for escalating the rhetoric. Deep breaths will just make you dizzy Chicken Littles, instead of the plain ol’ wannabe headless ones.