Someone stole Capt. Ed’s McCain-Palin-Communist-Revolution lawn sign. Observe his whining ways. He even uses the “The case of the…” construct in the title of his post, as if some rough-n-tumble cop who plays fast and loose with the rules might be close to cracking this one wide open.

Oh! And he’s even got a pic up of his wife, son-in-law, daughter, and conceived-out-of-wedlock grandchild just to make sure you know he’s totally humorless. (Fun fact: Ed’s wife, a.k.a. “The First Mate” is blind.) Perhaps I know too much about these people. Let me know when McCain throws in the towel. This sux.

Bonus: Ryan does his impression of Capt. Ed wanking into a bowl of Capt. Crunk, a.k.a. the last paragraph of any Queeg post:

Interestingly enough, the original story fails to get at the heart of the most notable aspect of the dynamic. Not that the sign was stolen, per se. (That’s to be expected.) It’s that the sign won’t be readily replaced. McCain ensured his supporters that the RNC’s warchest alongside his own public financing would be enough to take on the Democrat candidate. Maybe Feingold was onto something when he collaborated with Senator McCain…

Ah… It’s soul-shattering writing like I’m getting paid by the word.